I started working professionally in medical nutrition about 20 years ago, and few things cause more heartache and frustration to me than hearing from women and men that something bad has happened to them since they had children. Unfortunately, in the vast majority of cases I hear women tell me "I got fat from pregnancy", adding and emphasizing that before pregnancy they had a very good figure. I usually hear from men that they have gained weight because somehow they are "forced" to eat what is left over from the children's plates. Or many times I hear from both men and women that they stopped exercising because they had children, or that they stopped exercising after their children were born. No one disputes that pregnancy creates intense hormonal fluctuations in women, and these hormonal fluctuations often significantly affect metabolism. No one disputes that the obligations that come along with children when they come into the world limit the available time for activities such as exercise. All this is true and we all know it, especially those of us who have children. But it is a very big mistake to talk in front of the children. Children, and especially young children, do not have the ability to understand these expressions. All they feel is deep guilt for doing this harm to their parents. The fact that they have no way of expressing it, even when they are older, shouldn't give you the false impression that they are not filled with guilt and resentment. These guilts and resentments accumulate over the years and lead to self-loathing. When the child grows up, he or she feels as if he or she has done something very bad and he or she doesn't know why. Parents should not fill their children with guilt for choices that the children themselves bear no responsibility for, because ultimately the child did not ask to come into the world. The child is the parent's choice. If this choice led to a series of consequences, the parent who made this decision is solely responsible. Under no circumstances should children be blamed either directly or indirectly. Please protect your children. They are not to blame for anything. Thank you very much.

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